Enough About Me ... Let's Talk About You

One day this week as we were standing outside school getting ready to go home, an older student approached Tyler and started asking about the patch of gray hair on the back of his head. His questioning was loud, a bit rude and included many of his own opinions about why Tyler had gray hair and what was going to happen next with it. It was nothing like the people who have politely inquired about it.

He even crossed a personal boundary and touched Tyler's hair. I honestly don't think the kid was trying to be mean, in fact, I think he may have a minor learning disability that inhibits his social filter.

At bedtime last night I asked Tyler about this interaction and he said, "Oh yeah, that kid always does that."

"Really? You've never told me that before," I said, feeling shocked that he had never mentioned it. "Does it bother you?"

"Sort of," he said.

"What is his name?" I asked.

"I don't know," he replied.

At that point, I explained to Tyler my hunch that this child probably has a minor learning disability that inhibits his social filter, and that he was most likely not trying to make Tyler feel bad.

But disability aside, there are plenty of people in the world who operate without social filters, so I knew this was an important lesson for Tyler.

My take on situations like this is that we can't control what other people think, do or say. The only thing we can control is us -- what we think, do and say.

So I suggested to Tyler, "The next time he comes up to you and starts talking about that, just smile and say, 'Enough about me ... let's talk about you. My name is Tyler. What's your name?'"

Then I gave him some questions he could ask the kid about himself. Things like -- "How long have you gone to this school?""Who are you friends with?""What do you like to do for fun?"

The key to handling situations like this gracefully is to turn the conversation around. Try to get the attention off of Tyler and on to the other child. Tyler really grabbed on to this solution and we talked about it for several minutes.

Honestly, this issue is not about the gray patch of hair on Tyler's head. He is really OK with it. It's been there since he was four -- and it's on the back of his head, so he rarely sees it or thinks about it. The issue is about how to handle awkward social situations with grace.

After my talk with Tyler, I went downstairs to talk to Paul about it, and much to my surprise, he said, "Your solution was right on, according to Dale Carnegie."

Imagine that -- me, unknowingly quoting Dale Carnegie!

Paul just recently finished reading Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People, so he explained to me Carnegie's 6 Ways to Make People Like You:

1. Become genuinely interested in other people
2. Smile
3. Remember that a man’s name is to him the sweetest and most important sound in any language
4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves
5. Talk in the terms of the other man’s interest
6. Make the other person feel important and do it sincerely

My advice to Tyler incorporated several of these items. I guess I was on to something without even knowing it! Common sense, maybe? Regardless, I thought I'd share with all of you in case it is a tool that can help you or your children! Happy Thursday!

What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stronger

I love that Kelly Clarkson song, "What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stronger."

I think it's a great reminder that the trials we experience in life can help us grow if we choose to let them.

I put the word choose in bold, because that is the key. When trouble comes our way, we have a choice -- we can either grow from it or become the victim.

The correct answer is to choose to grow -- and the proof is in the past. If you look back over your life, you will see that you grew the most as a person during the biggest challenges of your life.

I recently appreciated this gentle reminder from a couple of friends as I expressed my frustration about some of the challenges Alyssa has experienced in school this year. I was dwelling on the negative. I kept saying, "I can't believe this is how her Kindergarten year turned out." I was momentarily stuck in the disappointment of wishing things would have been different for her this year.

But my friends helped me see the positive in it. They reminded me of the promise I already made to myself. That I would not dwell on the negative. That I would sieze the opportunity to teach Alyssa and help her grow through the challenges. That all of the work we are doing with her now will be of benefit to her later, as well.

One of my friends has a fantastic approach to helping her children deal with problems at school. She sympathetically listens, talks about solutions with them, then asks them, "What are we learning from this?" I love that question at the end, because I think it solidifies the lesson and shows them how to better handle these problems in the future.

I think we are giving our children a huge gift if we can teach them at a young age how to look at life's challenges as growth opportunities -- and it helps us remember to do the same!

Because really, what else are we going to do?  Everyone has challenges in life. The most important thing is how we get through them -- if we stay positive, we will come out Stronger in the end.

---This blog is dedicated to all parents! We have such an important job!

Looking Beneath The Surface With Kids

Yesterday I noticed Tyler treating me less than respectfully. A little eye roll here, a tough tone of voice there. I was alarmed by it. This is not normal behavior for Tyler. Although I felt agitated, instead of yelling at him in the heat of the moment, I waited until later and pulled him aside to talk about it.

I gently asked him if anything was wrong. Told him I noticed he wasn't being very respectful to me -- I cited examples. I asked him if there was anything I did to make him upset with me.

He said "no," then he got all serious. He looked down and started to cry. He said that a project at school was really overwhelming and that he was feeling very stressed out about it.

So, we talked about that for a while. Then, I told him how we treat other people is a reflection of how we treat ourselves. So, perhaps the reason why he was being hard on me was because he was being too hard on himself regarding this project at school.

You see, Tyler's real problem was not with me, even though he was taking it out on me. It was within himself with his own thought patterns.

I talked up his little self-esteem by telling him what a wonderful student he is. That I am totally confident he will do a great job on the project. That I know he will do his best work -- he always does. I also pointed out that what he is learning is valuable and will be needed in future grades.

This seemed to help my little guy quite a bit. It took him a little while to perk back up, but he surely did! By this morning he seemed his normal self. It was surprising that a third grade project would have him so worried, but to him, it's a really big deal.

The reason I am sharing this with all of you is to show you how you can get to the heart of matters with your children. When they act out, dig deeper. Be a good observer of their behavior and really listen when they tell you what is wrong. You'll be amazed at how much you can help them!

I am happy to teach all moms about how to utilize these valuable parenting tools! Contact me if you would like more information!

“The Secrets of Being the Best Mom” FREE Teleclass

Are you struggling with the role of being a mother? Is it more difficult than you thought, but you’re afraid to admit it? Do you wish you could just learn how to relax, let go and trust that you are the “best” mom your kids could ever want?

Then, join me and fellow life coach Mir Lynne Pietrzyk for “The Secrets of Being the Best Mom, a FREE teleclass that will assist you on your journey to becoming the mother you want to be. 

Mark your calendar for Wednesday, April 25 from 11 a.m. to Noon CST (Noon to 1 p.m. EST) to hear Mir Lynne and I discuss the secrets all moms need to know about how to create the life and home they desire with their children.

The top 3 secrets you will take away from this teleclass are:

• How to enjoy and make memories out of every day 
• How to give your children the exact amount of TLC they need to thrive 
• How to get it all done and still have time and energy for YOU 

To register, visit http://bestmom.eventbrite.com/. The dial in information will be emailed to you after registration.

Tina Offers Life Coaching Program About Living Consciously

Tom Clare / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Sometimes we go through life ... well, just going. We are so busy that we don't stop to really think about what we are doing or if we are even happy.

We live as a slave to our "do-do" list, feeling constantly exhausted and like there is never enough time to get it all done.

If you're a mom who would like to take some time to slow down and evaluate your life and make sure you're living it to the fullest, join me for an 8-week group life coaching session that will help you learn to live life more consciously.

What Will be Covered? In the safety of a supportive environment, moms will learn tools and techniques for living life to the fullest every day by making conscious choices. You will pick one area of life to work on and make better – it can be health, finances, spirituality, relationships or career. You'll be amazed by how much you can change your life in only 8 weeks!

What are the Top 3 Benefits of a Group Coaching Program?
• You surround yourself with other women facing similar challenges.
• You learn new techniques for goal-setting, action planning, stress management and more.
• You gain motivation from the coach AND the group!

When is it? This program consists of 8 one-hour sessions – one per week, starting at 7 p.m. on Wednesday, April 18.

What is the Cost? Program cost is $20 to YMCA members, $40 for non-members. (Materials cost is $14 that will be paid to the instructor at the first class.)

How do I register? Call the Y at 847.296.3376

Where will it be held? Lattof YMCA Meeting Rooms

What do I Need to Bring? Physically, you will need a writing journal and a pen. Mentally, you will need an open mind. Emotionally, you will need the desire to make your life even better than it already is!

The 5 Love Languages Can Save Marriages!

So, there is this couple having trouble in their marriage. The wife says, "I cook for him. I clean for him. I bring his shirts to the cleaners. I take care of the kids all by myself morning, noon and night. He doesn't ever help me. I just don't think he loves me."

The husband says, "All she ever does is criticize me. She is always complaining. I don't know what I need to do to make her happy."

What's going on here? Is this couple doomed? According to Dr. Gary Chapman, author of The 5 Love Languages, this couple may simply have a language barrier.

Dr. Chapman explains that after many years of counseling, he noticed that everyone has a “love language,” a primary way of expressing and interpreting love. He also discovered that, for whatever reason, people are usually drawn to those who speak a different love language than their own. (Of course!)

Based on his research, he discovered five primary love languages. They are:

• Words of Affirmation
• Quality Time
• Receiving Gifts
• Acts of Service
• Physical Touch

So, for the couple listed above. The wife's language is acts of service, and the husband's is words of affirmation. Instead of using words of affirmation to build her husband up, the wife is tearing him down by complaining about all of the help he is not giving her. Because to her, when you love someone, you help them.

Her complaining is her cry for help, but her spouse does not see it that way. He sees it as criticism, because words of affirmation are important to him. So, instead of answering her pleas for help, he is running the other way -- away from the criticism.

But, once this couple learned what their love languages were and how to speak the other's love language, their marriage started to heal and improve. Today they report their marriage is better than ever! How awesome is that?

Here's a link to the book if you're interested! You can also take an online quiz to help you discover your love language.

I would also like to mention that these languages apply to children, friends and family too! Can you imagine how much better our relationships could be if we knew the love languages of everyone around us?

Calling All Moms! This Spring, Clean up Your Mind, Body and Soul with Group Life Coaching

Image: Michal Marcol / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Spring is just around the corner. That means it’s time to wake from our slumber, shake off those winter blues and refresh and revive ourselves.

If you are ready to do some spring cleaning with your mind, body and soul, join Certified Master Life Coach Tina Haisman as she leads a group of moms on an 8-week journey into a season of living a more healthy and balanced life.

What Will be Covered? In the safety of a supportive environment, moms will learn tools and techniques for handling the many ups and downs of mothering young children and keeping their family happy and healthy. They will pick one area of life to work on and make better – it can be health, finances, spirituality, relationships or career. Moms will learn how to achieve their goals and become the mother and woman they want to be.

What are the Top 3 Benefits of a Group Coaching Program?
• You surround yourself with other women facing similar challenges.
• You learn new techniques for goal-setting, action planning, stress management and more.
• You gain motivation from the coach AND the group!

When is it? This program consists of 8 one-hour sessions – one per week, starting at 7 p.m. on Wednesday, Feb. 22

What is the Cost? Program cost is $20 to YMCA members, $40 for non-members. (Materials cost is $14 that will be paid to the instructor at the first class.)

How do I register? Call the Y at 847.296.3376

Where will it be held? Lattof YMCA Meeting Rooms

What do I Need to Bring? Physically, you will need a writing journal and a pen. Mentally, you will need an open mind. Emotionally, you will need the desire to make your life even better than it already is!

My glowing little pumpkin

They say a picture is worth a thousand words, and this one of my little pumpkin is, indeed!

I find myself repeatedly coming back to admire this shot, so I thought I should try to pinpoint what I love about it so much. Here's what I came up with:

I love ...

• How beautiful Alyssa looks. 
• How happy she looks.
• How clear the sky is. 
• The orange pumpkins dotted all over the ground.
• How the setting sun makes the picture glow orange.
• How the color of her skirt matches the pumpkins. 
• The fact that we are in a real pumpkin patch ... on a beautiful farm. 
• That Tyler is in the picture, even though he is walking the other way.
• That the picture makes me feel peaceful.
• Knowing how much fun she had that day!

Motivational Mom's Life Coaching Seminar

Ouch! I'm Wearing my Heart on the Outside of my Body

Yesterday when I picked Alyssa up from school, she came out of the building crying and very upset.

She couldn't even tell me what happened. I had to ask one of her friends. Apparently, a little boy told the teacher that Alyssa and another girl (his twin sister) hit and pushed him.

Alyssa said it was an accident. I'm not sure what she means by that. She's not normally the hitting type. Neither of my kids are. I wish I could have been there to observe the dynamics of the situation, because I don't know how to counsel her on what went wrong.

I asked if she hit him because she was angry with him, but she said, "No, it was just an accident." What does that mean? I'm confused. It's hard for me to imagine her just up and hitting or pushing someone. But, if she did, then she needs to know the consequences. I certainly don't want her hitting or pushing other children!

Anyway, the teacher had her apologize to the boy and said she would have to sit out on playtime the next day (today). Alyssa was confused by that. She thought if she said she was sorry that that would be enough. I had to explain to her that saying she was sorry was good, but that she made a bad choice in "accidentally" hitting someone, and that the time-out is the punishment for the bad choice.

So, since the event was at the end of the school day, Alyssa's punishment went overnight. (I think that was punishment enough!) The whole evening was excruciating for both of us. I felt like somebody ripped my heart out. She came to me in tears many times. She was worried her teacher was mad at her. She was worried about how long the time-out would be. She was worried that another teacher might see that she had a time-out and get mad at her too.

I tried to console her. Tyler tried. Paul tried. I even had her call a girlfriend from school. That actually turned out to be a really sweet experience! The girl was very caring and reassured Alyssa that everything would be all right. She made her giggle. She even said she would give her a prize if she was good during the time-out! How cute is that?

This morning on the way to school, Alyssa was pretty somber. I tried to cheer her up by making up silly songs about being in time-out, but it only worked mildly. (Might have been my singing!) All I can hope is that she learns something from this, and that we'll never have to deal with a problem like this again, and that this event scared her enough to always be on her best behavior at school.

I think for the first time I truly felt the essence of that Elizabeth Stone quote, "Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body." Wow.

A letter to my 5-year-old about riding the school bus for the first time

Here it comes!

Dear Alyssa,

Here we are at the beginning of your kindergarten year. That, in and of itself, is a big milestone, and we have both been so excited about it. You are growing up very fast, and I am so proud of you. This is going to be a great year!

Last week after much begging, I let Tyler ride the school bus for the first time. When I said, "yes" to his request, I knew you were going go want to ride it, too -- and that I'd probably have to say, "yes" to you, as well.

The facts are these my little angel: Tyler is eight. Tyler is a boy. You are five. You are a girl. Yes, you are a big girl, but you will always be my little girl. And you are my youngest child.

Getting on!

Some of the other kindergarten moms thought I was crazy to let you ride the bus. Others wondered why I wouldn't let you ride it.

Everyone -- friends and family -- cracked up when they heard I met the bus at school to see your bright, shining face as you got off of it. I laughed too! I guess it is kind of funny! But, why wouldn't I? I love to see you happy. And I love to see you so excited about getting to do big kid things!

When I finally gave in and said you could ride the bus, I was in the kitchen and you were standing at the top of the stairs looking over the railing at me with hopeful eyes. As I very quietly said, "yes," you started jumping up and down and screaming with glee. Then you ran right into your room to get your shoes and socks on. It made me feel soooo fulfilled to see you that excited! I think I will always remember that moment.

Speaking of moments, another doozie was that day in the car this week when you were talking to me about riding the bus, and I said, "I'm not ready for you to ride the bus." Then you so matter-of-factly replied, "But mom, I'm ready."

Arriving at school!

Well, Alyssa, I know. I know you are ready. You are so totally ready. But mommy will never be ready to let go of her little girl -- even for such a small thing as to take a 10-minute bus ride to school.

I just want you to know that I love you with every fiber of my being and that I like driving you to school. So if you ever decide you don't want to ride the bus, I'll gladly take you there.

Love,
Mommy

Journaling for your Health, Happiness & Healing

I am often met with a look of resistance when I speak to my clients about the journaling homework they need to do in-between our coaching sessions.

After the look, they start spouting off excuses, such as, "I'm not a good writer," "I don't like to write," "I can't spell," "I don't know what to write about," "I don't have time."

Many people simply don't understand the power of journaling. The truth is that journaling is one of the best things you can do for yourself.

Here's an interesting tidbit about how it works -- writing uses your left brain, which is the analytical and rational side. So, while you keep your left brain busy by putting your thoughts on paper, you allow your right brain a chance to open up and be creative. This helps you understand yourself and those around you better and allows you to come up with creative solutions to the challenges you are facing. 

Here are the top 5 reasons you should make time to journal:

• Journaling helps you clarify your thoughts and feelings
• Journaling helps you get to know yourself better
• Journaling helps you reduce stress
• Journaling helps you solve problems 
• Journaling helps you heal relationships with others

Here's how you get started:

• Buy a journal and pen that you love

• Find quiet place

• Set the mood with a candle or cup of tea

• Journal at the same time each day for 15-20 minutes

• Write without editing or censoring

Here's what you can write about:

• Write about what makes you happy

• Write about what makes you sad

• Write about your goals and dreams

• Write about what you want to accomplish that day

• Write a letter to yourself

Contact me if you would like more information!

Moms, Join Me for a Group Life Coaching Program at the Y

Being a mother is constant. It never stops. There is more written on each one of our daily “to do” lists than is humanly possible to achieve; and as if that’s not frustrating enough, we’re supposed to make motherhood look easy and show up to every function smiling and looking like beauty queens. 


We have the best of intentions. We want to be the best we can be. But, where are we supposed to find the time and energy to do it all?

In this inspiring and motivational exclusive YMCA offering, Certified Master Life Coach Tina Haisman will lead you on an 8-week journey to transforming into the mother and woman you want to be!

Who Should Come?Busy moms who want to learn how to reduce stress and live a healthy and balanced life.

What Will be Covered? In the safety of a supportive environment of other moms, you will learn tools and techniques for handling the many ups and downs of mothering young children and keeping your family happy and healthy. You will pick one area of your life to work on and make better – it can be your health, finances, spirituality, relationships or career. You will learn tools and techniques for achieving your goals.

What are the Top 3 Benefits of a Group Coaching Program? 

• You surround yourself with other women facing similar challenges.
• You learn new techniques for goal-setting, action planning, stress management and more.
• You gain motivation from the coach AND the group!

When is it? This program consists of 8 one-hour sessions – one per week, starting Wednesday, July13th

What is the Cost? FREE to YMCA members, $40 for non-members

Where will it be held? Lattof YMCA Meeting Rooms

What do I Need to Bring?Physically, you will need a writing journal and a pen. (They need not be fancy, but they can be fun!) Mentally, you will need an open mind. Emotionally, you will need the desire to make your life even better than it already is!

Testimonials … What are Other People Saying? "Eight weeks of life coaching has made a remarkable difference in my life. Tina has helped me to put action behind several goals that I had set for myself but had been unable to accomplish on my own. Her positivity and encouragement have led me to not only achieve my goals, but also to have a better outlook on life and the challenges I face each day. I would recommend life coaching to anyone who wants to move forward in their life, whether it be in the area of finances, career, relationships, spirituality, or health. And don’t we all?" April

Heaven is for Real

I read a great book yesterday called Heaven is for Real. It's about a four-year-old boy's trip to Heaven while he was having emergency surgery.

I enjoyed many stories from this book, but one of the things that made the biggest impact on me is how the little boy, Colton, met his sister in heaven -- a baby his mother had miscarried. He did not know about the baby before this experience, because his parents thought he was too young to understand.

Colton told his mom that a little girl came running up to him in Heaven and wouldn't stop hugging him. She told him that she was his sister and that she had died in her mommy's tummy. As Colton told his mom this story, she was, of course, in shock, but he reassured her the little girl was OK, because God adopted her. Wow. (There's more to the story, but I'll let you read it for yourself!)

That story really made me smile, because it reassured me that the baby I miscarried is in heaven waiting for me. I've always believed that in my heart, but this story helped reaffirm that.

The whole miscarriage experience for me was a bit of a shocker -- I was 12 weeks along when I realized the baby was no longer alive. It was a Sunday, just two days after Hurricane Charley hit Southwest Florida. I instinctively knew. Oddly enough, I knew because I felt well for the first time in the pregnancy.

The timing for a miscarriage seemed horrible -- electricity was still out in some places, everyone in town was working to clean up and get back to normal. It was hot and humid and everything felt very heavy.

But, you know me, I always look for the silver lining, and I found many reasons to be grateful during that time -- especially for the love and support of family and friends. And, my belief that my child was taken to Heaven.

So, to read this book and learn that Colton met his unborn sister was awesome. It healed my heart to know that someday I will be able to hug my heavenly baby! :)

Florida Vacation = Fun with Treasured Friends

We have been looking forward to this vacation for a long time! We planned 5 days at Disney and two weeks in Fort Myers. Wow! A 3-week vacation -- we've never taken that long of a vacation. But with the kids on summer break and 15 years worth of friends and family to visit in Fort Myers, we knew we would want that much time!

It started out with a BANG when one friend and her kiddos met us at Disney -- can you say FUN??? Then, a few days into our Disney trip, we met up with another family who happened to be there at the same time! We made memories for sure!

Once back in Fort Myers, we began calling friends and scheduling the fun. We still have almost a week to go here, but the kids are having a ball seeing all of their Florida friends again! (Not to mention their Grandparents!!!)

On one level, I feel complete joy during these play dates -- because we are able to be here, because the kids can go 6 months without seeing each other and still play like we never left, because our friends make time for us. Because our friends are just generally awesome!

But, I also feel pangs of sadness at times, because we miss our friends, and it's difficult to watch the kids have to say "good-bye" again. Of course, we try not to say "good-bye," and we talk about the next time we will all get together, but it's still emotional.

One of the most profound feelings I feel is of gratitude. That our friends will make time for us during our visit. That we have so much fun when we are together. That our friends will subject their children to having to say "good-bye" again. We are so lucky to have such great friends! My heart is FILLED with love.

We love you guys!!! See you all soon!

"You Guys Make Me Feel Like A Rock Star"

I have known since she was very young that my daughter, Alyssa, is here to teach me things -- many things. How to be a good friend is one of them.

This year has been one of extreme growth for Alyssa (and I) on the friendship front -- from leaving the comfort of her Florida friends to making new friends in Illinois to learning how to be a good friend.

Watching her this year has reminded me of the quote, "If you want to master it, teach it." Clearly, when I am teaching Alyssa, I am also supposed to be learning.

One recent story Alyssa shared with me was about how she was playing with two other neighborhood friends. They were getting along famously, and, apparently, being very nice to each other. Whatever they were doing caused one of the children to say, "You Guys Make Me Feel Like A Rock Star!"

Wow! What a great lesson. We should all aim to make our friends feel like Rock Stars! I seized the moment to talk to Alyssa about that. And I have since used it to guide her when she faces challenges with friends.

I'm so grateful Alyssa had that experience, because it showed her how good it feels to make someone else feel good. Now we have a very concrete example to go by. And, it gave me a great teaching tool and lesson for myself!

This blog post is written with love, gratitude and admiration for all of the rock stars in my life. xoxoxo

Did We Meet Our April Abundance Goal?

I must apologize for waiting so long to update on my family's adventure of finding $1,500 in April! Are you wondering if we achieved our goal? Yes, we did! We even beat it by $244! Our total money found was $1,744!

In case you missed it, we set out to "find" an extra $1,500 in April! The money could be found via income or significant savings. Our motivation was to experience the feeling of financial abundance, because we believe our thoughts create our life.

Simply thinking positively about what you want and being aware of when it comes into your life can make all the difference in the world.

Here are a few of the ways we "found" more than $1,500:

• A few "just because I love you" cash gifts from my mom and dad (That's just the way they are -- and they had no idea of our plan!)
• A trade on new lawn equipment -- Paul will do computer work to earn it!
• An amazing deal on our Disney trip that got us a free rental car!
• Two huge prescription coupons that cut our out-of-pocket cost in half!
• Three amazing Groupons worth nearly $200!

There's more, but these are the biggies!

I believe everyone can attract whatever they want into their life -- whether it's money, friends, romance, health, increased spirituality or increased happiness! It all starts in your mind!

Give it a try! You have NOTHING to lose!

From the Mouths of 8th Graders

I have been blessed with the opportunity to bring my life coaching gig to the 8th grade students at Tyler and Alyssa's school.

I've been given four 40-minute classes -- one a week for four weeks. Truthfully, it's not much time, but I'm doing my best to impart some life skills on these kids.

The first week we talked about discovering their gifts (both God-given and learned). Last week we talked about the Law of Attraction (What you focus on, you receive). This week we talked about relationships -- mostly the dating kind (yes, they are dating in 8th grade).

I used the upcoming nuptials of Prince William and Catherine Middleton to start the conversation, and to capture their attention, I showed them the T-mobile spoof of the royal wedding.

Then, we got down to the serious business of talking about relationships and why they can be so difficult ... about how movies make it look like "happily ever after" is easy ... about what each of us can do to ensure we have healthy relationships ... and so much more in our 40 minutes. But what impressed me the most was the insight of these kids.

I asked them each to come up with one piece of advice for the royal couple. Seriously. Out of the mouths of 8th graders came these very basic, but sensible pieces of advice:

• Respect each other
• Allow each other space to be his/her own person and spend time with their friends
• Love each other
• Support each other
• Help each other
• Don't cheat
• Don't lie
• Be honest with each other
• Have fun
• Spend time together
• Find a hobby to do together
• Laugh together
• Communicate with each other
• Don't fight
• Appreciate each other

I thought these were all great reminders, and I was really impressed with these kids for having this knowledge so young. I also find it funny that I'm there to teach them, but somehow I always walk away feeling like I've learned something, too! Awesome!

Fun with Money

I'm having fun with money during the month of April and thought I'd share! I'm trying to "find" $1500 through income or purposeful savings.

Tyler and Alyssa on our spring
break vacation -- an activity I'd
like to do more of!

I was inspired by the law of attraction that says we attract what we focus on. So, theoretically, according to the law, if we focus on lack of money, we will receive the experience of having a lack of money. But if we focus on the abundance of money, we will experience an abundance of money.

Now the law of attraction is awesome -- positive thinking is definitely going to bring you better experiences in life, but I believe more is required than just the thinking alone. There must be an action plan. You can't expect to just sit there doing nothing except thinking positively and have money fall into your lap.

The action plan doesn't have to be difficult or incredibly time consuming -- just devote a little time each day to whatever you are trying to change in your life.

So, how am I doing on "finding" $1500 this month? Pretty darn good -- I'm already over $800! There have been a few miscellaneous checks that filtered in, some huge savings on items we would normally buy through coupons and Groupons, random bits of money just showing up, gifted money and more!

I'm also scouring our budget and refining it to make sure we're spending our money wisely and according to plan.

My intention with this exercise is to change my experience with money from a state of worrying about it to enjoying it and truly believing it is abundant. So far so good! What fun!

Experiences Help us Know we are LIVING!

We just got back from a wonderful mini-vacation in Lake Geneva, WI. It was our first time there. The reason for this blog post is to share my excitement about enjoying new "experiences" and stepping out of our comfort zones.

We stayed at the Timber Ridge Lodge and Waterpark, where they have several pools, hot tubs and two big water slides.

One of those slides was for going down in a raft, which was totally fun! But the other slide was for going down without a raft -- and it was pitch black inside. I wasn't so sure about trying this myself. Paul tried it and said it was fun, but a bit scary. I didn't attempt it the first day, but by the second day, I knew I had to!

I mean really -- kids 48 inches tall were going down this thing and having a ball, why shouldn't I!?  So, whoosh, I did, and I'm so glad! What fun! It was a little scary being in the water in the dark, and, to be totally honest, I did have to remind myself to breathe, but it was exhilarating to try it!

The other experience I almost let pass me by was going in the hot tub -- outside. Why? Because every time we walked by it, I froze my butt off. But Paul and Tyler pushed me, "You've gotta try it!" I was hesitant, but OMG! I  LOVED IT! I think I found a new favorite activity for when it's 30 degrees outside! I loved the feeling of being soooo warm under the water, while above the water, the fresh air was mixing with the mist and gently brushing across my face. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

As a parent, I notice that Tyler is a bit like me -- a little afraid to try something new -- especially something that could be risky. He did not want to try the water slide on the raft, but I reminded him of how much he loves the ride Test Track at EPCOT ... and how he was reluctant to get on that ride, too. That got him on the water slide in a jiffy!

While we were there, I also noticed the resort uses the word "experience" to describe their daily activity schedule. They say, "We don't remember days, we remember experiences." I thought that was really cool.

Overall, we had many wonderful "experiences" on our trip -- we tried new foods, taught the kids to play checkers, went down water slides, played in the pools, drifted in the lazy river, played family bingo, relaxed by the fire, discovered Lake Geneva and more. What fun!