The Busy Mom's Blueprint for Happiness

Many moms have asked me to describe what I do for my clients, so I thought I would share my Blueprint for Happiness with you. If you see yourself in any of these problem areas, call on me for guidance!

Your Problem	Your Solution	Your Benefits
You’re not happy. You don’t know exactly why.	Learn how to live with intention so you can be happy.	Feelings of Freedom, Joy, Love, Happiness ·     Ability to Live in the Moment ·     Ability to Live with Intention ·     More Balance, Less Chaos ·     Clarity on What is Truly Important ·     Align Actions with Goals
You are stressed and overwhelmed.	Learn how to get organized with Coach Tina’s simple system.	Feelings of Peace, Freedom, Joy, Energy ·     Ability to Live in the Moment ·     Ability to Live with Intention ·     More Balance, Less Chaos ·     Clarity on what is truly important ·     Align Actions with Goals
You are so busy. Life is messy. You have no time for you.	Learn how to find time for you.	Feelings of Peace, Love, Connection to Self and God ·     Ability to Live in the Moment ·     Ability to Live with Intention ·     More Balance, Less Chaos ·     Clarity on What is Truly Important ·     Align actions with goals
You always say yes. You feel guilty saying no.	Learn how to set healthy boundaries.	Feelings of Freedom, Connection to Self and God, Respect, Safety ·     Ability to Live in the Moment ·     Ability to Live with Intention ·     More Balance, Less Chaos ·     Clarity on What is Truly Important ·     Align Actions with Goals
Deep down, you don’t believe you are good enough. You are worried what others think of you.	Learn how to discover and own your gifts.	Feelings of Joy, Love, Respect, Freedom, Connection to Self and God Happiness ·     Ability to Live in the Moment ·     Ability to Live with Intention ·     Clarity on what is Truly Important
You are stuck in negativity about a problem.	Learn how to turn your problems inside out.	Feelings of Freedom, Joy, Love, Respect, Connection to Self and God ·     Ability to Live in the Moment ·     Ability to Live with Intention ·     Clarity on What is Truly Important
You are having problems in any one of your relationships.	Learn how to repair and grow strong, healthy relationships.	Feelings of Freedom, Love, Joy, Respect, Happiness ·     Ability to Live in the Moment ·     Ability to Live with Intention ·     Clarity on what is truly important ·     Align Actions with Goals

You feel guilty for everything you are not doing right – whether at work or at home.	Learn how to stop comparing yourself to other moms, stop saying “should,” and see that you are doing the best you can.	Feelings of Freedom, Love, Respect, Joy, Happiness ·     Ability to Live in the Moment ·     Ability to Live with Intention ·     Clarity on What is Truly Important ·     Align Actions with Goals
You can’t seem to shut your mind off. You are always worrying about something.	Learn how to live in this moment.	Feelings of Joy, Freedom, Peace, Happiness ·     Ability to Live in the Moment ·     Ability to Live with Intention ·     More Balance, Less Chaos ·     Clarity on What is Truly Important
You’re looking for help making a difficult decision.	Learn how to look for a new perspective.	Feelings of Peace, Freedom, Joy, Happiness ·     Ability to Live with Intention ·     More Balance, Less Chaos ·     Clarity on What is Truly Important ·     Align Actions with Goals
You feel unmotivated. Stuck.	Learn how slowing down actually helps you get more done and find more joy.	Feelings of Freedom, Joy, Peace, Energy, Happiness, Time ·     Ability to Live in the Moment ·     Ability to Live with Intention ·     More Balance, Less Chaos ·     Clarity on What is Truly Important ·     Align Actions with Goals

Spring Renewal Life Coaching for New Moms

Calling All New Moms! 

Join Certified Master Life Coach Tina Haisman at Twisted Tree Yoga Studio in Des Plaines as she leads you on a 4-week journey into a season of living a more peaceful, healthy and balanced life.

Why? The first year of motherhood can be filled with extreme emotions – from pure joy and bliss to having doubts about your ability to be a mother to added tension mounting in your marriage.

This is all normal, but there is a way to learn how to even out the rollercoaster ride and bring more calmness, centeredness and peace into your life.

This spring, carve out some much-needed time to reflect on what is working in your life, and what is not. Learn how to embrace the changes motherhood has brought your way and create the life you wish to live.

What will I Learn? In the safety of a supportive environment, you will learn:

• How to reconnect with yourself
• How to go from surviving to thriving
• How to deal with stress better
• How to live in the moment more

When is it? Tuesdays at 12:30 p.m., starting Tuesday, April 8th 

Where: Twisted Tree Yoga, 1403 Prairie Drive, Des Plaines, www.twistedtreeyoga.org

What is the Cost? Program cost is $100 for all 4 sessions

To Register: Call Twisted Tree Yoga at 847.736. 3385

You Can Change Your Life ... You are not a Tree

This quote is about taking action in life. It's one thing to complain about something in your life that you do not like. But it is another thing entirely to do something about it. Yes, it takes courage, but you can do it. You are not stuck in place like a tree. Even a tree, while it is stuck in the ground, grows and changes. You can too! This is what we teach our clients!

How to Inspire More Love in Your Life

Most people say they would like to feel more love in their life, but what they don't realize is that this love must come from within. The secret to receiving more love is actually giving more love. And the best place to start giving love ... is to yourself. 

Learning how to love yourself is a fun and uplifting project, and the month of February is the perfect time to start it. Here are a few ways to get connected with Coach Tina if you are ready to experience the joy of having more love in your life:

Private Coaching
Work with Coach Tina privately as you create love all around you. This option gives you the most benefit, because it gives you the most time and attention from the coach. Coaching sessions are generally scheduled on a weekly basis. Click here for more information.

Group Coaching
If you'd rather not go it alone, share the love and form a group of friends to go through the coaching experience with you. Every member of the group will set their own goals and benefit from the synergy of the group as you all cheer each other on. Choose to meet once a week or once a month in the comfort of your own home. Email tina@haisman.net to set up your group.

Book Clubs
What's more fun and engaging than reading a book alone? Reading with a group of friends. Put together a book club today! Tina can make recommendations and facilitate the group discussion for you. Email tina@haisman.net to set up your book club.

As always, Coach Tina offers a complimentary consultation to see if coaching is right for you. Contact her at tina@haisman.net or at 239.292.2882 to set up a call.

The Miracle of Gratitude

Have you ever listened to yourself talk before? Really listened? What do you hear? Predominantly positive statements? Negative ones?

One of my clients recently shared that she has been caught in a spell of negative thinking and speaking. She's struggling with an incident that is causing her to feel angry and sad. She keeps finding herself rehashing the incident, justifying her actions and imagining confrontational scenarios in her head.

Has that ever happened to you? I think it happens to most people at one time or another.

The problem with being stuck in negativity is the belief that what we think about we bring about. So, when you find yourself in this negative place, it is very important to get yourself out -- and quickly!

How do you do that? Well, there are many tools, but one of the most effective is to focus on gratitude.

The cool thing about gratitude is that it is both scientifically and spiritually proven as a healing method. People who are grateful are more optimistic, joyful, healthy, productive and less stressed.

Of gratitude, Dr. Robert Holden, author of Happiness Now, said this, "The miracle of gratitude is that it shifts your perception to such an extent that it changes the world you see." 

You can incorporate gratitude into your life in a number of ways. Here are a few suggestions. Try one or maybe even all three!

• Before you get out of bed every morning, thank God for all that you have. 
• During your journaling, thank him again in writing. (If you don't regularly journal, start a gratitude journal.)
• Express your gratitude again before you go to sleep at night. (It's great to do this with your children and/or your spouse.)

It's powerful stuff. But don't trust me -- try it out! I am confident you will find that although it takes work to focus on gratitude, the good that comes from it will feel like a miracle! 

Today, I am grateful for the opportunity to share this little reminder with all of you!

The Scream of Terror

Since yesterday was a holiday, today was the first day of our week, but it didn't start off too well.

At precisely 6:30 a.m. the scream of a terrified Alyssa came curdling down the stairs into the kitchen -- the result of her new alarm clock that apparently scared the heck out of her! (Oops!)

A picture from a happier day!

As I was hugging her and calming her down, she said, "Mommy I feel weird."

"What kind of weird," I replied.

"Like I'm going to throw up," she said.

Oh geez! I rushed her to the bathroom to be near the toilet, and she stood there hunched over it for a minute or so. "Great, the stomach bug," I thought. But she never really threw up -- only phlegm came out. I was thinking we were lucky that her stomach was empty from the night before.

I noticed she was hot and sweaty. Suddenly burning up. White as a ghost.

She said she wanted to sit down for a minute, so she did, on the bathroom floor, when suddenly her eyes rolled back into her head and she fell over. OMG!! "What the heck is going on?"

At first she didn't respond to me calling her name, but then she did look up at me. It only lasted a second, but it seemed like an eternity.

We laid her down on the sofa and took her temperature, which was only 100.3. At that point, we decided to just let her rest. She slept for an hour.

When she woke up, said she wanted to watch TV and soon began requesting food and drink. I was surprised she wanted to eat so soon after that whole bathroom episode, so just to be safe, I held her off until the 2 hour mark to make sure her stomach had time to calm down.

That was thankfully the end of the drama. She slowly perked up throughout the day -- although she only got off the couch to go to the bathroom. It seems as though other cold symptoms are coming on now, so we'll see how this recovery goes! Hopefully quickly!

At this point the whole day feels like a blur. It certainly started off with a bang -- terror for her with the sound of an alarm clock and terror for me as she passed out (or whatever that was). Sheesh. Can we have a do-over on this day???

But even as I say that, I know I shouldn't, because there were many blessings in this day:

1. It is only a minor illness.
2. It gave me some valuable, restful time alone with Alyssa.
3. Tyler could take the bus to school, so I didn't have to leave the house with a sick child.
4. A friend offered to bring Tyler home from school for me (he doesn't ride the bus in the afternoons).
5. I didn't have anywhere I "had" to be today, so I could easily stay home to take care of her and not worry about anything else.
6. It's not the stomach bug!!!
7. I had time to do several loads of laundry!
8. I had several hours to sit on the sofa and get some work done on my new laptop!
9. My calves were killing me from yesterday's workout, so I had a convenient excuse to skip today's workout!
10. The gray, cloudy skies were very uninviting -- a great reason to stay inside and light some candles!

I could go on and on, but you get the point! Anyway, feel better Alyssa!!! Mommy loves you!

Do you ever have such a productive day or evening that you end up feeling energized at the end of it instead of exhausted?

I had one of those nights last night. We spent the day with family, so I felt fulfilled in that sense. But when my "me time" arrived, around 8 p.m., I felt no energy.

Image: 89studio / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I was so disappointed, because I was really looking forward to being productive. I almost gave up and sat down to veg out on the sofa, but instead I drank a glass of water and decided to just do ONE thing.

After I did that, I felt energy, so I kept on going. They were all little, mindless things -- I had to mend a couple of items, reprint a Christmas card label that was wrong, put away some clothes, go through my email, get organized with the school papers for today, etc...I was shocked at how much I got done after I started my evening thinking I had no energy.

While I was mending, I listened to a Focus on the Family episode, which gave me the feeling of accomplishing two things at once! It happened to be a humorous topic, so that made it more enjoyable!

What surprised me most was how great I felt when I got into bed. Instead of feeling exhausted, I felt fulfilled. I had crossed several things off my to-do list and even nourished my soul with the Focus on the Family episode. Awesome!

That was a great lesson to remind me to:
1. Drink more water! and
2. Just try to do ONE thing when I think I can't do anything!

How do you make it through when you feel no energy?

It's the simple things in life

This morning, Alyssa surprised us by coming downstairs from her room all dressed and ready to go to school. Oh. My. Gosh! What a surprise! What joy! Wow!

She was joyful, too!

I asked her how this happened. She said she heard Tyler getting ready, so she decided to get up and sneak him into her bedroom so he could help her get dressed.

Oh my gosh! I'm grinning from ear-to-ear. What a great start to my day.

Our usual mornings consist of me waking her up at 6:30. Bringing her downstairs. Serving her breakfast. Reminding her to take a bite every minute or so. Accompanying her back upstairs to get dressed and brush her teeth and hair. And constantly reminding her to stay on track. It's very annoying and labor intensive for me.

So, this morning, I celebrate! Yeahhhhhh! (And overlook the fact that she forgot to make her bed.) LOL!

I should be on the cover of a magazine

I realized this morning I should be on the cover of a magazine -- the cover story for why moms need to take care of themselves.

Image: sixninepixels / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I have been ignoring some issues in my back and neck for a couple of months now -- knowing I needed to get to a chiropractor to be seen. But I put it off for all of the same reasons moms put off taking care of themselves. Unfortunately, I put it off long enough to let it literally snap me into crisis mode yesterday.

I made one quick move at 5:30 in the morning -- that my body was not awake enough to compensate for -- and wham. Instant pain. Pain that causes eyes to well up with tears and stomachs to turn over. Pain that causes a mom to think, "How am I going to take care of my kids today?"

As a result of putting off something that should have been looked into ages ago, I spent the better part of the day at the chiropractor's office and getting x-rays. Not to mention in pain. I feel like a lost an entire day. If only I would have taken care of this sooner.

So, as I sit here writing this with an ice pack on my neck, I'm still thinking on the positive side. Although painful, this experience has been a great learning lesson for me. I need to take care of myself. No matter what else is going on. When I know something is amiss, I will do myself and my family a great deal of good to have it taken care of right away. I hope you will do the same!

Airing my dirty laundry publicly

As many moms do, I struggle with how to get everything done, but I've had a recent epiphany that is making my life easier and more enjoyable, so I wanted to share.

For the record, I realize it's highly possible I'm the last one to jump on board this train, but just in case I'm not, I wanted to share with you.

I'm 3 weeks into doing a load of laundry every day instead of waiting until Sunday to do it all, and I'm liking it! It's working!

Why on earth was I waiting until Sunday to do all of the laundry? Well, for starters, I didn't like doing laundry, so I didn't want to do it any more often than necessary. Plus, I am a "check it off the list" kind of a girl, and I thought if I did all of the laundry on one day, then I could check it off my list, and it was done for the week.

But that left drudgery to look forward to every Sunday -- not only was the weekend ending, but now I had 7 large loads of laundry to wash, dry, fold and put away in one night. Sometimes it rolled over into Monday morning, which I really hated.

So, why the switch? Well, I have some friends who do laundry this way, and I recently read about it as a tip in Darla Shine's Happy Housewives book.

What I have discovered is that by doing one load each day I can still satisfy my need to check something off the list. One load of laundry each day. Check. Done! As an added bonus, each load is smaller since I'm doing it more frequently. Yippee!

The only negative thing I have noticed is that it's more difficult to complete on the days I am not working from home. But when that has happened, I just did two loads the next day. No big deal.

I'm so excited about this change and how it's making my life easier. Even though I have added one more item to my daily to-do list, I actually feel more productive because of it!

So, there you have it. Now the whole world knows about my dirty laundry!

Do moms feel like they lose themselves by design?

A few days ago I wrote about an amazing moms retreat I attended. Today I want to expand on one of the topics we discussed, because I think it's important for all moms to think about.

Me and my kiddos on a lunch date!

The discussion was about how we as moms lose ourselves after having children. You don't really realize it is happening, it just seems to be a slow death of the woman you once were before having children. Then you wake up one day and look in the mirror and have no idea who you are looking at.

In some respects, that is good, because once you have children, you will never be the same woman.

But it's painful to feel like we lose touch with our true selves. That we forget what we like to do in our "free" time. Or as we moms like to call it, our "me" time.

As moms we crave this "me" time, but when we suddenly get it, we don't even know what to do with it. Plus, we feel guilty about taking it.

In the earlier days of having small children, I can remember wasting at least half of my "me" time just trying to figure out what to do. That was so frustrating.

When we talk about this as moms, it is as if we have done something wrong. That we have let ourselves go by not paying attention. While on some level this may be true, I would like to think about it more positively.

Maybe this "low" of motherhood is really a high. Maybe it's part of "growing up" -- a natural progression of life. Maybe through losing ourselves we are actually finding ourselves. Maybe this loss is something we all have to go through so we can become more aware of who we really are ... and what our gifts are ... and why we are here.

It can be all of that if we want it to be. I think the important point in this conversation is that once you wake up and realize you have lost yourself, it's time to start taking action to reconnect with yourself. That woman is still there, you just need to spend some time rediscovering her.

I believe the experience of motherhood is shaping me into the woman I want to be. I believe that I am exactly where I am supposed to be right now. I trust in the process and know that everything will turn out as it should. I hope the same for you!

Retreat teaches moms how to take better care of themselves

I went to a mom's retreat yesterday that really got me energized!

It was an intimate retreat with only 10 moms, plus the three speakers. The women ranged in age from mid-twenties to early 50's. (Yes, moms in their mid-twenties! Yikes!) This group of moms was awesome, impressive and inspiring. I can't say enough about them.

The group was very diverse in age, occupation and backgrounds, but we had much in common as moms. It was encouraging to hear other women's stories of how they approach motherhood and the experiences they have been through. We laughed about the funny stuff and supported each other through the tough stuff.

I think part of why I feel so great about the retreat is that the organizers did an excellent job of helping us get to know each other before the sessions started. That set the atmosphere in the room, because we were already pretty-well acquainted with one another by the time we got to the sessions.

We heard from three speakers: Lori Radun, a life coach from Momnificent; Beth Aldrich, a healthy lifestyle and nutrition expert and author of Real Moms Love to Eat; and Saren Eyre Loosli, a trainer and founder of Power of Moms.

Saren shared with us about her great website and all of the helpful resources it has to offer. I would say whenever you find yourself struggling with something in motherhood, head on over to this site for some practical tips and advice! Good stuff!

Lori spoke to us about boundaries -- a topic I was excited to hear about, because it's something I have been working on over the past few years. Boundaries can be tricky, because they are different for everyone, but if we don't learn to set boundaries for ourselves, we will very quickly find ourselves frazzled, frustrated and resentful.

Finally, Beth taught us about feeding our body and soul with a lifestyle and foods that are good for us. It was a very easy-to-grasp, holistic approach to taking care of ourselves. Loved it! Then, she served us a delicious, healthy, satisfying lunch! (Wonder if there are any left-overs! Beth, I'm coming over!)

Being a mom is the most difficult thing many of us women will do. It's such a big job, and there are no text books. It's so nice to know that we're not alone. We're not the only ones struggling. And that there are people out there who care and are willing to help. I left this special retreat feeling even more motivated to continue my work as a life coach in inspiring other women!

The Haismans had a case of the Mondays

How did your Monday morning start off? I have to be honest, we usually start really smooth around here, but today wasn't quite that story.

I thought I started smoothly -- got up before the kids to get ready, and had already prepared their snacks and water the night before! Yeah, me!

But, Tyler was all upset about his hair not looking right. Then he put on the wrong school uniform for today and had to completely change. All of this caused him to be too late to ride the bus to school, which caused him to be quite whiny.

Alyssa sat at the kitchen table for nearly 20 minutes doing absolutely nothing except complaining that what she wanted for breakfast was not available. This caused her to have to rush for the rest of the morning. Then, as we were pulling out of the driveway I looked up into her bedroom and noticed her bedroom light was on. (That's a major offense in our house!)

Also, we couldn't find one of the library books that is due today. I looked for it Saturday, yesterday and this morning with no luck. Why is it always the library books that go missing?

Anyway, I talked to the kids on the way to school about them having to do better in the morning. We get up plenty early to get ready without rushing, but there is no time for wasting.

I very purposefully create a loving, peaceful atmosphere in the mornings. I want my children to start their day calm, not in a state of panic and frantic rushing around to get out the door. This morning I even had a candle lit before the crabbiness ensued.

I do feel somewhat responsible for the rough morning though, because we had a pretty busy weekend. I think when the kids don't get enough down-time, it's more difficult for them to pull everything together on Monday morning. Last night we got home with just enough time for them to brush teeth, get in their jammies, say prayers and get in bed. They had no time to relax. I think that would have been helpful.

So, now the kids are at school, and I am getting a few things done. I put dinner in the crock pot so I can assist with homework and keep things low key this afternoon. Oh, and I found the book, by the way, it was in Alyssa's closet inside a purse! :)

Here's to a more peaceful Monday afternoon!

How do you know it's time for a mommy break?

How do you know it's time for you to take a break from your children? I know I've waited too long when I start cringing or feel like I want to cry every time one of my children calls my name. I feel like saying, "What? What could you possibly need from me right now? Please just leave me alone!"

I got to that place yesterday. There are many reasons why, but I think the last straw was that school was cancelled at the last minute on Friday due to water problems in the building -- so I suddenly lost six hours of planned "me" time.

Part of me was excited for the kids -- they were downright gleeful! It was fun to see, and I remember feeling that way as a child when school got cancelled!

At the time, I didn't think it was a big deal. I was OK with it. Even though I had errands and a nice lunch with a friend planned, it could all be rescheduled. But, what I didn't realize was how much it would impact me later.

Overall the day was awesome while I was living it. We met up with a couple other school families and went to a pumpkin farm. Then we had friends over for a play date and dinner afterward. Fun times! It was a super-fun, kid-friendly day! But, looking back on it, I can see why I felt overwhelmed the next day -- it was just all kids, all day. Like 10 kids talking to you at once. Even if it's fun, it can still be exhausting.

So, when I found myself cringing every time one of my children called my name Saturday afternoon, that was my cue that I was overdue for some mommy time. So, I left home to run a few of the errands I was supposed to do on Friday. I felt great by the time I got back, but that quickly went away as soon as the demands started up again at home. I was disappointed by that. But I realized that I needed something more or different.

So, instead of fighting it, I went up to my bedroom, closed the door and rested for a while. I didn't sleep, which would have been very nice, but I rested peacefully without children asking me about or for something every five seconds.

Luckily, Paul understood and picked up the "slack" and even made the kids dinner. Another blessing was that we had a date night planned, so I knew I had that to look forward to, as well.

I'm still not 100%, but I am aware that I need to continue to work on it for the rest of the weekend -- or until I'm back to feeling like I can give again!

Teaching children how to be a supportive friend

Yesterday Alyssa told me about an event that happened at school last week that prompted a little lesson about how to be a good friend. Here's how our conversation went.

A friend pulled a piece of fruit out of her lunch and said, "Look what I got, Alyssa!"

Apparently, since Alyssa does not like that particular fruit, she replied, "Oh, I don't like that fruit."

Well, her friend did not like that remark and told the teacher on her. At this point I was perplexed. Why would someone tell on you because you stated your opinion that you do not like a particular fruit? But I knew there must be more to the story, so I pushed on.

I asked Alyssa, "Why do you think your friend told on you for that?" She said she didn't know. Then, my brain started firing -- the friend's feelings were hurt. I see what happened!

I said, "Why do you think she showed you that piece of fruit?"

"I don't know," she replied.

"Because she was excited about it," I said. "She wanted you to feel excited for her."

I continued, "Remember how you were excited to show your friends your face painting from Fall Fest?"

"Yes," she said.

"Well, your friend was excited about what was in her lunch in the same way. Do you think next time you could say something like, 'Cool! I'm happy for you.' When she shows you something she is excited about?"

"Oh. Yeah. I can do that." Sweet!

Then, wouldn't you know it? Moments later I looked at Tyler's religion homework, and it touched on the same topic! OMG! How lucky am I?

I read her the words right off the paper -- "When something exciting happens to people, many of them want to share their good news with others."

So, when people share their good news with us, it's polite and loving to respond by letting them know we are happy for them -- even if what they are excited about is not a preference of ours.

I then proceeded to practice with her for the rest of the evening in funny, lighthearted ways to help get the point across.

I know Alyssa did not intend on hurting her friend's feelings by saying she did not like the fruit, but the delicate point is that there was something better she could have said.

She doesn't have to pretend she likes the fruit, but she could have been supportive and showed her friend that she was glad she had something in her lunch that made her excited. Hopefully we've learned a lesson that will stick!

My glowing little pumpkin

They say a picture is worth a thousand words, and this one of my little pumpkin is, indeed!

I find myself repeatedly coming back to admire this shot, so I thought I should try to pinpoint what I love about it so much. Here's what I came up with:

I love ...

• How beautiful Alyssa looks. 
• How happy she looks.
• How clear the sky is. 
• The orange pumpkins dotted all over the ground.
• How the setting sun makes the picture glow orange.
• How the color of her skirt matches the pumpkins. 
• The fact that we are in a real pumpkin patch ... on a beautiful farm. 
• That Tyler is in the picture, even though he is walking the other way.
• That the picture makes me feel peaceful.
• Knowing how much fun she had that day!

Fall is a Great Time to Slow Down

These two trees are across the street from Tyler and Alyssa's school. Even though I see them multiple times a day, they still make me smile every time.

They are the first trees we notice that turn red every year. They look so grand perched among all of the other trees that are still green.

Every time I see these trees I am naturally reminded to slow down, take a deep breath and enjoy the sight.

Fall is a great time to try to live in the moment and enjoy every day. Be sure to spend some time out in nature -- away from the hustle and bustle of your busyness -- and just be. It will help you connect more fully with yourself and your higher power. It will help you feel renewed and refreshed, and it will help you refocus and remember what's really important in life.

Happy Fall!

All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten

Remember that poem "All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten" by Robert Fulghum? Boy, has that been on my mind lately.

Almost every day since school started, Alyssa has been coming home upset with stories about how friends were not nice.

The types of things we are talking about are things like excluding friends from the group, not cooperating while figuring out what they want to play, saying hurtful things like "you're not my friend" or "I wish you didn't go to this school." (Ouch!)

Initially, I was so surprised that we were having these types of friendship experiences in kindergarten, but it turns out I'm not alone. Some even say it's normal. (Yuck!)

Lately, I've spoken with many moms who have had children in kindergarten, and they all say they've experienced the same thing. REALLY? Oh my gosh! I thought kids wouldn't learn how to hurt someone's feelings until later -- much later.

I have found it difficult to teach Alyssa how to be a good friend. The dynamics seem to be so complex and mature for this age. But, believe me, I have been working on it. We've read age-appropriate books, we've had many mother-daughter conversations, we've prayed, we've asked for divine guidance, and, of course, I've done my research by reading parenting articles, talking to the teachers and speaking to other moms.

Things seem to be normalizing, but I intend to keep these conversations and lessons going. Now, instead of looking at the situation with frustration, I am looking at it as an opportunity to teach Alyssa how to be a good friend at a young age. I know these lessons will help her for years to come.

I think a couple of the most helpful things I've done have been communicating with other moms, praying with Alyssa, and bringing the language back down to her level. That's what made me think of the kindergarten poem. I think I was initially trying to help her with a complex adult mind, instead of going back to basics -- back to kindergarten -- back to the simple mind of a child.

A few of my kindergarten tips:

• Be nice.
• Cooperate.
• Share.
• Don't hit.
• Don't push.
• Say you're sorry.
• Forgive.

My favorite line of the poem is this: When you go out in the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands and stick together.

I saw Alyssa holding hands with one of her friends today, and it warmed my heart. I know the learning curve has been challenging, but I see them all sticking together.

An Award Brings College Memories Flooding Back

I accepted one of the greatest honors of my professional career last night. I was inducted into the Vidette Hall of Fame with three other outstanding professionals.

I worked at the Daily Vidette, the ISU student newspaper, from the first day of my freshman year until the last day of my senior year.

HOF Inductees Marc Lebovitz, Tina Haisman and Bill Mulvihill
pause for photos with Vidette General Manager Rick Jones.

To say my memories of that time are sentimental would be an understatement.

Listening to the other professionals last night was so interesting. I realized that although none of us worked for the paper at the same time or in the same role, our overall experiences were remarkably similar.

We all spoke of how well the Vidette prepared us for our professional careers -- even though we didn't really realize it at the time.

We also spoke about how the Vidette was the primary source of our ISU family and friends. I didn't join a sorority in college -- I didn't need to. The Vidette filled that role for me.

The Daily Vidette has long been one of the most successful student newspapers in the country. I am so grateful to have been afforded the opportunity to be a part of it during my time at ISU.

I will always cherish my Vidette memories and experiences, and being honored as one of its best only makes it sweeter. I am so blessed.

Written with honor and gratitude for all Videtters of the past, present and future.