Inspiration and Photos

I got a new camera for my birthday, so I've been taking lots of fun pictures! I have found I most love watching and capturing wildlife.

I've been having some fun lately pairing up my photography with inspirational quotes. I share them mostly on my Love of Life Coaching page on Facebook, but I thought I'd post a few here, too! Enjoy!

This little guy visits our back yard daily!

I love how beautiful these bright flowers look next to the rustic shed.

This is my son jumping into the pool at his Grandma and Grandpa's house.

Don't Cry Over Spilled Freeze Pops

Oh how I love perfection! In everything I think, say and do, I am always shooting for it, but sometimes, too many times, I fall way short.

I was given some experiences to practice the other day that were just hilarious in retrospect, so I wanted to share.

Alyssa asked if she could open the box of Freeze-Pops I bought that day. She has been bugging me to buy them all summer, and, I have been trying to let her do more things on her own, so I handed her a pair of scissors to open the box.

I supervised, of course, but before I could stop her, she stabbed the top of the box with the scissors. She didn't know any better, and has probably seen me open boxes this way before ... but that is not the tactic I would use with a box of 100 tubes of spill-able, sticky, staining liquid!

So, I showed her the right way to open the box, which did not really need scissors, by the way (my bad). Then we peeked inside to assess the damage. Luckily, there was only one pop that was leaking. No biggie, so I took that one to the sink and asked her to put the rest in the freezer.

For some reason, she thought she needed to separate the pops before putting them in the freezer, and as she pulled them apart, one ripped right in the middle. Spill-able, sticky, staining, red liquid shot everywhere as I carried the carnage over to the sink to dispose of it! And that is when I lost it. I yelled out her name in a frustrated, blaming tone, as if it was her fault.

It was not her fault. I'm the one who decided it would be wise to carry the darn thing over to the sink, not her. She didn't do anything wrong by tearing them apart, that's what she thought she was supposed to do. She ran up to her room crying. Who could blame her.

After I cleaned up the mess, I went up to her room, knocked on her door, got down on my knees to her level and said, "I am so sorry for yelling at you. That was not your fault. You did nothing wrong. Can you forgive me?" Thankfully, she did!

This story would be finished if that was the end of the excitement for that day, but alas, it was not. The next mess occurred just two hours later as we were leaving for a potluck dinner at church. We had baked some really cool cupcakes with filling in the middle.

As we were leaving, Alyssa volunteered to put them in the car. I was happy to let her help. She took the container from me, but could not fit it between the seats, so she tipped it sideways to make it fit! Logical, right? Well, not if what is in the container is frosted cupcakes!!!

"Nooooooo," I yelled out! At that moment, I remembered the lesson I learned earlier, so I asked her to hand me the container, and I brought it back inside to the kitchen table to survey the damage.

My first reaction, was, "Great. They're toast." But after a deep breath and a second look, I realized I could salvage the cupcakes if I re-frosted the tops and pulled the paper wrappers off the bottoms (because they were now covered in frosting).

Nobody followed me inside the house to see what was happening (they were probably afraid of my reaction), so I went back out to the car and told them to come back in while I repaired the damage, because it was a scorching 94 degrees outside.

Alyssa stood next to me while I doctored them up. I could tell she was waiting to see if I was going to get angry, so I said, "Boy are we having a wacky day, or what?" She laughed and started making jokes of her own.

As an added bonus, my dad was there, so he helped me clean up the mess and we were back on our way out the door in no time.

For the record, the cupcakes turned out fabulous! And hopefully I'm well on my way to learning not to cry (or yell) over spilled things!

Fake on Facebook?

This topic has been on my mind for a little while, so I just wanted to take a quick moment to address it.

Since Facebook has become popular, there have been many accusations of people being "fake" and only posting good news on their status updates. I even saw a t-shirt at Walt Disney World making reference to this. While I'm certain there are people out there who do that, I would like to offer another possibility.

Maybe some people just prefer to be positive. Personally, I am intentional about posting positive information and thoughts on Facebook. Not to be fake, but because I believe in the Law of Attraction, which says, "what you think about is what you bring about."

That means, if your mind is negative and full of complaints, then you are going to receive more of that. But if your mindset is positive and full of gratitude, you will receive more of that. 

I don't want to go on Facebook and spread negativity around. And that is not what I want to read on Facebook. I don't want to be dragged down by negative energy. 

I'm not saying it's never OK to complain on Facebook. But if we find that most of our posts are complaints, we might want to take a look at that. Yes, there are always challenges in life, but what really matters is how you choose to look at them. I choose to see the glass half-full. I choose to see the silver lining. How about you?

For the Love of 436 S. Prindle

For my entire life, 436 S. Prindle has been an important address. It is the address of my Grandmother and Grandfather's home and the gathering point for our entire family. We visited almost every weekend growing up. Probably 99.9 percent of my memories of my grandparents took place at that address. It feels like a part of my heart resides there.

Now that both of my grandparents have gone to heaven, the time has come to find a new, loving family for their home. I never thought this day would come. I just thought my grandmother would always be sitting at her kitchen table with her coffee and my grandfather would always be tinkering away in the garage.

To say this is an emotional transaction would be an understatement, but I have put on my "business" hat to help handle the details -- for my father's sake, mostly. He says this is one of the hardest things he has ever had to do in his life. I'm glad I can be here holding his hand through it.

One thing that has really helped is that we were able to hire my favorite Realtor to do the job. He's amazing and "gets" it. He gave us some pointers, picked the price point and sent it out to the market.

After only eight days, we received an offer that brought us all to tears. The offer was from a young family who sent a letter with their offer to let us know how much they would like the home. They said they grew up in the same town as 436 S. Prindle, and their families live only blocks away from the house. They said they wanted to make our house their home as they raise their family.

I'm pretty sure this is the only way my father and aunt would have been able to "let the house go." I think my Grandfather in heaven knows this. It had to be a family. And I'm certain they were hand-picked.

Wanna know something else really cool? The closing date the buyers selected is my grandfather's birthday. July 12. I just had to smile when I saw that. It was totally unexpected, and nothing short of a miracle when I think about everything we went through in preparing the house to go on the market --  all of the cleaning, painting, planting and more.

At first we worked at a leisurely pace, but then we suddenly had only three weeks before our deadline to get it on the market in time for summer, and then my father ended up in the hospital for two of those three weeks, totally unable to help us.

And then there's the story of the buyers -- who knows how they ended up at this exact time ready to buy this exact house, but I'm sure they think it's pretty amazing, too. If only they knew they are buying more than a house -- they are buying a home filled with much love and many cherished memories. I pray they will make many wonderful memories there, as well.

I swear, I don't know why I ever worry. Everything always works out.

Too Late To Apologize

While I don't think this headline is true, I did think it was a catchy title for a blog about apologizing -- and I love the song!

Anyway, there is so much to say about how to apologize, but today, I just want to focus on one little word that should never be included in an apology.

The word is "but." If you ever hear yourself say this word during an attempted apology, STOP yourself immediately, because you've just canceled the apology.

It doesn't matter if you are apologizing to your child, your spouse, your parent or a friend. The use of the word "but" renders your apology null and void. It tells the other person you are not sincere and that you are not taking responsibility for hurting their feelings. Furthermore, it introduces an excuse for your offending behavior. This hurts the offended person even more.

Here are a couple of examples of what not to say:

• "I am sorry I yelled at you, but you made me so mad." 
• "I am sorry I said mean things to you, but I'm just so frustrated with how you've handled this situation."
• "I am sorry for losing my temper, but you shouldn't have done that."

Here are a couple of examples of more sincere apologies:

• "I am sorry I yelled at you. I should not have done that. I love you so much. Can you forgive me?"
• "I am sorry I said mean things to you. I did not mean to hurt your feelings. I value our friendship and I want to make things right. Is there anything I can do?"
• "I am sorry for losing my temper. You did not deserve to be treated that way. I am working very hard to try to never do that again. Will you accept my apology?"

And of course, you actually have to be sincere with your words!

Just this morning I had to practice a good apology with my daughter. I had lost my temper and yelled at her. I could have given her a long list of reasons why I felt justified about yelling at her in the moment, but the truth is none of them matter. The only thing that matters is that I love her and I want to treat her well. I want to parent her with kindness, compassion and grace. Yelling has no place in that.

On the positive side, when I slip up and do yell at her, I am giving myself an opportunity to apologize, and I am showing her how to apologize -- good lessons for both of us!

There's no question about it, apologizing is difficult, but with some work and practice, you can get better at it. If all else fails, just try to think about how you would like to be apologized to and go from there! And remember, the end result is a reconciliation of the relationship that was broken by the offense.