Worry is a Prayer for Chaos

© Can Stock Photo Inc. / Elwynn

In her book Miracles Now, Gabrielle Bernstein explains how worry is a prayer for chaos. Oh how true. Nothing good comes from worry.

But worry is a natural human emotion, so how can we avoid it? Is there a button to shut it off?

Yes, there actually is. Gabby suggests simply noticing the thought of worry and staring down at your nose. Just that simple action will take your attention away from the worry. Then you can get to thinking about something more positive and productive.

I use a different tactic. I acknowledge the thought and dismiss it by saying something like, "Thank you. I am a warrior of light, and I say no to this thought."

I dare you to try this at home!

Let's Be More Like Children

Did you know 40% of what we worry about never comes to reality; 30 percent of what we worry about has already happened and cannot be changed; 22 percent of what we worry about regards problems that are beyond our control; and only eight percent of what we worry about are situations over which we have any influence. Eight percent.

Think about the energy we waste compiling that list of things that could go wrong. Think of the misery we create for ourselves as we worry about all of these things. 

I've learned a new habit -- when the list compiling or worrying starts, I notice it, acknowledge it, then say a prayer about it. You'd be amazed at how quickly that will shift your mind back to the present moment again. Admittedly, some days, I have to do this over and over and over again, but it's better than the alternative of staying stuck worrying about the future.

Because when you're worrying about the future, you're not living in the now. In fact, you're flat out missing the now, which is all there really is. 

Changing Schools Need Not be a Hair-Raising Experience

"By the way, your children are going to be just fine in their new school." These are the comforting words my doctor said to me as he looked me in the eye before leaving the exam room. It made me smile, because I knew he was right.

I "know" my children are going to be fine there. They will be fine almost anywhere, because they are very adaptable kids, but somehow this worry affected me so deeply that it has caused me to lose what feels like an enormous amount of my long locks (hence the visit to the doctor).

I've been through this before. Stress brings it on. Or shall I say, "makes it fall out."

But I thought I was dealing with the stress better, so it came as a surprise when the strands of hair just kept falling and falling and falling. My hair feels noticeably thinner now.

What happened to cause all of this shedding? We found out last April that none of the other four boys in my son's fourth grade class were planning on returning to the school for fifth grade. It's a smaller school -- his grade only had 16 students, five of whom were boys.

Although it was small, it worked with five boys. But, to think he might be the only boy or one of only two or three boys was unacceptable to my son, my husband and myself. Especially since he is at the height of his tween years -- he needs the influence and camaraderie of other boys.

After prayerful consideration and much research, we decided it was best to make a move. Luckily, we have many great schools in our area and found no problem with discovering a school with a larger population of boys that met all of our other criteria. That was the easy part. So, why the stress?

We had just changed schools when we moved across the country three years earlier, so I was worried that another school change so soon might be difficult for them.

• I worried if they would be OK in a larger school.
• I worried if they would get lost in the shuffle.
• I worried about them making new friends.
• I worried if the kids at the new school would be nice.
• I worried about the old school -- about the impact of five children leaving one grade.
• I worried about what other people were saying about our family's decision.
• I worried I was letting people down -- even thought I knew our decision was right for our children.

But now that school has started, and I have seen that the kids are doing just fine, I think what is happening with my tresses is the release of this worry.

I think my hair is giving me the signal to shed the worry -- like the trees shed their leaves in the fall. They die for the winter so they can live in the spring. It's time for me to put an end to the worry so I can live in the bountiful harvest of "now" ... which, by the way, is a really wonderful place!

The worrying mom

I've come to realize that the worrying of a mother will never end. Although my mother has told me this on several occasions, I am one of those people who has to experience it for herself. And so it is as I sit here worried sick about my 5-year-old boy, T-man, who discovered a lump under his right nipple over the weekend. Yes, I said HE discovered it. Crazy I know. Somehow I feel guilty for not pouring over every inch of his body every day to make sure everything is normal.

We ran in to the pediatrician's office on Tuesday. He said he thought it is probably one of two things -- either a hemangioma (which is more common in babies) or a hormone related growth, which usually occurs in babies or teenagers.

Either way -- it is unusual. He recommended we start with an ultrasound, so we did that today. The pediatrician -- who is incredible, by the way, called me back already to go over our options. They are: 1. wait and see (come back in 2 weeks) if it grows, shrinks or stays the same, 2. go to a pediatric surgeon to have it removed and biopsied, 3. get a blood work-up and go to a pediatric endocrinologist to see if it is hormone-related. Ugh.

So, now the hubby and I will sleep on it and see where we want to go next.

I'll keep you posted!